Jennifer and her husband Marc met 8 years ago. Their relationship consisted of mutual respect and love for one another.
They enjoyed late night talks about their hopes and dreams. Jennifer was a loving wife who supported all his endeavors. Marc was a loving husband who adored Jennifer’s playful and adventurous spirit.
They led a very passionate life together in every aspect.
Then Jennifer got pregnant and Marc had to move up the corporate ladder to support his family.
As time passed on and around kid #3, their late night talks about their dreams and hopes ceased to exist as more of their interactions were geared towards the kids, household duties, paying for bills and creating a parental choreography of picking up and taking their boys to and from their school, soccer practices and to various appointments.
Marc works long days at the office trying to keep his family afloat and Jennifer is a stay at home mom. By the end of each evening, Marc and Jennifer are both exhausted.
Occasionally, Jennifer will flip through the television channels or does that scrolling thingy on Facebook while Marc reads his book in bed.
Jennifer can’t even remember the last time they’ve talk about their feelings, their dreams or even shared a genuine laugh together anymore. She can’t remember the time they connected on an emotional level. Jennifer feeling overwhelmed and wanting time to herself, begins to feel resentful towards Marc, who spends every other Saturday playing golf with his buddies.
Jennifer also yearns to connect with Marc, just like the old days. When she tells him that something needs to change, an argument usually breaks out between them. Marc, feeling pressured by his wife and work, pulls even further away from Jennifer’s attempts to bond. Jennifer, feeling rejected, does a Google search on how to fix her marriage.
She comes across an article that tells her this:
A Super Sexy Trick to Force Your Partner Into Loving You Foreevvvver:
Remember when you two could barely keep your hands off each other? Nowadays your relationship is as exciting as eating bran flakes for breakfast in your sweats. Your relationship is falling prey to the mundane of everyday life.
The only solution: Sex it Up!
Drive him wild and make him want you by putting away your granny panties and buy a $100 sexy lingerie set.
Hot Damn! This will not only improve your sex life but it will help you two rekindle the passion that used to run so wild between the two of you.
Say goodbye to the daily malaise of your relationship and say hello to your new passionate and exciting relationship!
The issues that caused a rift between you and your partner doesn’t matter because a successful sex life = a successful relationship.
Yours truly,
@~>~Sexy Relationship Dating Goddess ~<~@
The next day, feeling a glimmer of hope to transform her marriage, Jennifer goes to the mall and spends hundreds of dollars on lace panties, camisoles and delicate sheer teddies.
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Mika
Mika loves to help others overcome their transparent beliefs that prevent them from having the love they want. She does regular live online presentations on thriving relationships where she also answers live questions. Mika is not a fan of being tickled and one day Clay will realize this as they have way too many tickle fights.
10 Responses to Wearing Lingerie to Save Your Relationship is Like Eating a Chocolate Bar For Dinner
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Right on -So true! It takes a lot
Of effort to maintain a relationship – maintaining marriage is the hardest job especially through all the changes. People forget about working on maintenance.
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Mika Replied:
@ Christine,
Thank you, for that comment. You’re right, people DO forget to maintain their relationship. It take conscious people to have conscious relationships. It’s not easy, I totally agree with that. Trust me, I used to be the person who focused on nothing but external solutions to fix everything in my life. I wasn’t until the pain of staying the SAME became more painful than the act of me changing.
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I don’t think sexual intimacy ALONE will save a broken relationship but I don’t think a relationship can be saved WITHOUT resuming great sex. Sexual and emotional intimacy can’t be achieved in isolation — they rely on each other. Sex might not be all it takes, but it is a significant part.
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Mika Replied:
@ Katie,
I love your comment because you’re right! Emotional intimacy AND physical intimacy are critical parts in successful relationships.
Unfortunately, our society is immensely focused on sex appeal and external solutions that it has a huge impact on many of the conventional relationship advice out there. “Oh you just need to to have better sex” or “you need to look hot to make him want you.”(Look on the cover of those magazines the next time you’re at the grocery store) It’s always some form of “You’re not enough.” And people use external tactics to force a relationship because it’s easier than addressing how they’re bringing themselves to the relationship. There are so many resources out there that points them in directions that only address HALF of the equation–great sex=great relationships. I think once you have a solid foundation of emotional intimacy, the sex that occurs between you and your partner dramatically ignites a relationship. But before that fire is blazing, you need to start the fire, right? Thanks for your comment.
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Interesting article. A good example of someone applying a “band-aid” which will help heal a wound, but not resolve why it came about.
As individuals and in a relationship we have different needs. Some are to do with emotions, heart, logic and then comes passion. Sex is good, especially good sex. It be great for feeling intimate or an primal level. But with passion and high it is temporary.
The answer to developing any form of relationship is communication and openness. In your example, somehow along the line, the couple got trapped into the routine of their day-to-day lives: children and responsibility. Yes, the “r” word. They lost the passion and being open with their needs, loves & hopes. I would suggest that instead of going straight to sex, date each other. The couple make time. Maybe have a date night. Focus on them as the couple, not them as the family unit. Start sharing, as a starting point.
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Mika Replied:
Sophia!
Such a great advice–dating each other will help reestablish that connection that once fueled their passion together (in and out of the bedroom) and create a space for them to fully connect on a much deeper level. So grateful for your input and thoughts!
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You’re welcome. Come and vist my website. I love to also hear your shout.
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I have a similar story as to Jennifr and Marc. I was in a relationship with my now ex gf. Our relationship has been goin down hill for awhile. There were numerous occasions where she get all sexy and try to initiate sex some more. Think that was her way of trying to “save our relationship.” By then, it was already too late… sex was fun and great, but our relationship was already at the last of it’s ropes. For a man, sex as a solution is GREEEAT (my tony the tiger voice)! But using it to fix a troubled relationship alone is not enough. Just my 2 cents
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Mika Replied:
Hey Jensen,
Thanks for your comment. It’s probably safe for me to assume that your emotional connection with your partner had long disappear by the time she tried to “sex it up” in hopes to save your relationship. It’s always great hearing your input, Jensen:)
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brilliantly written
thank you
CHeers
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